Land o'Lessa

This week is one of the best – the sexiest dances are performed: The romantic Rumba, and the Sexy Salsa! We even saw the first 10s of the season! There were two of them, both for Mya and Dmitry’s rumba from Carrie Ann and Bruno, though Len brought them down to a total of 27 with a mediocre 7. OOOOOOOOH the BOOING!

Len must have needed some fiber or something, as he also gave out two 4s and a bunch of 5s and was consistently the lowest score all night long.

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Ahha! Now I know what it was that Macy Gray said backstage to Samantha Harris that had the judges cracking up so bad – so bad that poor Carrie Ann Inaba SQUEEKED her score reveal! Apparently, what I’d missed when I turned my head, was that Macy said of her dance… “I just feel like I popped my cherry!”

And ABC actually censored the word “popped”! Hahahaha! Oh, Family Programing, how do I love thee… let me count the ways…

Anyway – the results were not shocking in the least. In between all the ridiculous filler, and one TRULY awesome Lion King performance, we discovered that Ashley Hamilton, son of the Tan Man himself, was sent packing. Following him, was the poor dance cherry-less Macy Gray. Ashley had zero charisma – unlike his father in his season – and Macy’s performance was just.. odd, which wasn’t surprising at all, but still, you know, was.

And then they ended the show with a Dirty Dancing/Patrick Swayze tribute, and I’m not ashamed to admit that I got sniffly. Because of my allergies! Honest! It had nothing to do with the fact that I wore out my copy of dirty dancing soundtrack (on CASSETTE) and VHS, after seeing the movie 4 times in theaters despite the fact Mama was a little leery of the movie/title/previews.

I wanted to be Baby. I wanted to dance. I wanted Johnny to rescue me and tell everyone that “Nobody puts Baby in a corner!” Sigh. RIP Patrick Swayze.

Here we go – it’s the womens turn tonight to show us what they’ve learned so far! Who will give the men a run for their money? Let’s find out!

Actress Debi Mazar and Maxim
mmm yummy! Lucky Debi – who actually danced back in the 80s on TV. Hahahah. Maxim finds her talking frustrating, and she thinks if she can salsa as fast as she can talk? It’ll be fabulous.
Salsa: 6,5,5 = 16
Oh my Debi was nervous! Len says that it’s all about the hips but it wasmissing – her feet were flat, but she has potential, with a lot of work. Bruno says “You can work those Bazooms like nobody else!” But her timing went, they lost it, but they have potential. CarriAnn says she lacked connection from her character to her moves – she was thinking too much and they could see it.

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It’s here! Night one of a THREE NIGHT opening week. And we thought they were stretching it to 2 hours, and now it’s SIX? Good god people. Anyway – I don’t know that I’ll go indepth this way every week, but I was watching, and the keyboard was RIGHT HERE, so, you know, here we go.

Tonight – it’s all about the Men. And the MANBOOBS. Yes. You read that right. Wait till you see who SAID IT. This season? Already a hit!

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We’re down to four, and I’m still leaning toward Paul being the Mole – how about you? of course, that may see him eliminated, as I thought it could be Clay last week and yeah, bye bye Clay!

We start off dividing up into young at heart and a camera guy. Paul and Mark are together, and Nicole and Craig. It’s dexterity tests for tots though the catch is the young at heart player is blindfolded with their only view from the camera in their partner’s hands – which is a mirrored image. Harder then it looks, as the mind plays tricks on you, and your partner with the camera can not give you a good enough view. They put shaped blocks into the proper holes, kick a soccer ball into the net, and pour tea into teacups. There’s a whole bunch of mole-ish behavior, with zoomed cameras and spilled tea, and no one making a soccer goal. And then it’s the big test…

They have to walk across a plank between two buildings 2 stories high. Still with the camera/blindfold deal. So much for tot tasks! And of course it’s not that easy, they have to stop halfway across, pick up a piece of chalk, and then on the other end write “the Mole was here” on a chalkboard. Nice. (And also? not happening for me! Yikes! Sure, they’re all safety lined in and all, but still…)

Mark and Paul are first, and Paul is laughing, but it’s very shaky and nervous laughter. Oh and after the get the chalk, they only have 1 minute to get the message written. He makes it with seconds to spare! But of course, this makes Mark suspicious that Paul is the Mole since he did well on that one, but couldn’t make a goal with the soccer ball.

It’s Craigs turn, and his vertigo is kicking in, and he’s scared to death. Nicole follows his instructions as he says zoom in on the chalk – and he’s not even close to it… he makes it and picks up the chalk, and he starts across to the other side, and he’s taking too long to get to the other side. He makes it across without falling, but not in time to write the message on the board. Nicole says “even if he’s the mole, he didn’t have to mole it up that bad!”

Total pot is $353,500 after today’s efforts. Paul says Craig is his top suspect, especially after today.

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