The Lonliest Penis – Ben Martini’s Happy Hour

Yeah you! All this bullshit I write? Is mine. So keep your hands off, will ya? I'm sure you could totally come up with better shit on your own.

Also - dude. All opinions stated herein these pages are my own, and not those of anyone I might know, or work for. Just in case you think I'm slamming something important, like, oh, say, my work place. Anything that you might think is about you? Well, you might be wrong - but you might right too, and you just might be offended.

But ya know what? You also have the right to fuck the hell off. My world does NOT revolve around you. So put on your big person panties, and realize one simple truth:

We are adults. If you find me offensive - then quit fucking finding me.

[Thus ends the 'Behave or ima kick your ASS' portion of this blog.]