FWAW: Do they pee on a stick?
FINALLY it’s here! The girls have been asking me for weeks “is it the cow episode yet, is it mom? But WHEN will it be the COW EPISODE?” and finally, last night, it was the cow episode we’d seen on previews. (Yes, we’re a fan of Dirty Jobs, too. Why do you ask?!) Anyway, this episode, the girls are going to try and impress the town by doing a talent show. Nice. Before that, though, Matt surprises them with a spa day, from a bunch of Dolly Parton wanna be’s that make the girls a little nervous with their side ponytails and poofy hair. But they submit to the mani, pedi and hairdos willingly enough.
The girls then practice their ‘talents’ – Amanda sings, Brooke teaches the Electric Slide, Kanisha hola hoops, Christa decides to go for humor with a 7th inning stretch and Ashley starts with humor that falls flat then fakes a magic trick. Then the girls pull together a group son – Old Matt Had A Farm, that they managed to pull together even after Kanisha’s snitfit during the planning stages. Everyone does alright, the cheese factor is high, and Brooke comes out on top for teaching the town the Electric Slide, which the rest of the world has known since 1988. But whatever.
So Brooke is sitting pretty, and the next day Matt takes all the girls out for a pig roast. Amanda is upset that the pig still has it’s face, while Kanisha is insistant that she wants to chew on the pigs ear – Matt walks away and can’t watch. Hah. Smores, snuck kisses, and a heartfelt beg to get a one on one date, truth or dare where Ashley puts Matt on the spot again and demands to know if she’s going home – and everything is ripe for tomorrow’s elimination ceremony.
That involves cows. Pregnant cows. That can’t pee on a stick, so you have to wear a glove, lube up, stick your hand up their bum and see if you feel a calf. Nice. Brooke is really glad she’s sitting pretty now! It’s no real surprise when the editing crew makes sure everytime Kanisha opens her mouth to squeel a cow moos instead, nor is it a surprise when Ashley discovers her cow isn’t pregnant and she, and her poop covered arm, is eliminated. That was officially the BEST ELIMINATION CEREMONY EVER.
Brooke is finally rewarded with a one on one date, and they go out on the lake to drink and share and answer questions. Matt asks why she’s not been affectionate, which means she has to kiss up on him and prove she’s there for him. Matt may be a bit of a player underneath his shy exterior, methinks. Brooke goes back to the house all giggly and girly and tells the girls that she had a fab time, which means the girls then get busy plotting her demise. Naturally. They keep this up and Kanisha will be the only one left, and if she ends up with Matt I may have to lose faith in Reality TV forever. Because… ew.
Anyway, we’re now down to four! Who will steal Matt’s heart and life the Farmer’s life as the Farmer’s wife?
