This…

This is what happens when a certain lil Pup of mine falls STOPS MOVING, while waiting for her ride to the bar-b-que and bonfire to arrive…

I woke her up when they arrived, and she was eager to go – except she was a little groggy and got into MY car. Whoops! Much laughter ensued, I assured them she’d be raring to go in about 15 minutes when she woke up, and they were off.

I now have the entire house to myself – cept for the cats. I think I shall celebrate by, oh, I dunno, taking a shower without being interrupted.

Bliss!

And – via email from my MOM we have this joke:

A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, ‘Harry, what’s your problem?’

Harry answered, ‘I’m too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I’m smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!’

Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal’s office.

While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed.

Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him, and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: ‘What is 3 x 3?’

Harry: ‘9.’

Principal: ‘What is 6 x 6?’

Harry: ’36.’

And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know. The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, ‘I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade.’

Ms. Brooks says to the principal, ‘Let me ask him some questions.’

The principal and Harry both agreed.

Ms. Brooks asks, ‘What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?’

Harry, after a moment: ‘Legs.’

Ms. Brooks: ‘What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?’

The principal wondered why would she ask such a question!

Harry replied: ‘Pockets.’

Ms. Brooks: ‘What does a dog do that a man steps into?’

Harry: ‘Pants.’

Ms. Brooks: What starts with a ‘C’, ends with a ‘T’, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?’

Harry: ‘Coconut.’

The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open.

Ms. Brooks: ‘What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?’

The principal’s eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer,

Harry replied, ‘Bubble gum.’

Ms. Brooks: ‘What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?’

Harry: ‘Shake hands.’

The principal was trembling.

Ms. Brooks: ‘What word starts with an ‘F’ and ends in ‘K’ that means a lot of heat and excitement?’

Harry: ‘Firetruck.’

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, ‘Put Harry in the fifth-grade. I got the last seven questions wrong…’

HAHAHAHHA!

O. M. G.

I can’t hear myself think! Is NOISY around here! Well, not as noisy as it COULD be, I suppose, as the neighbor hasn’t called to bitch. Yet. Ha. And the girls are out in the bus with music and makeup and dancing and food and general fun… Yes, Girls. As in 13 year old girls. […]

She READS!

I didn’t want to do the summer school thing. I mean, this is MY last month before school starts too, and Summer School? She’d hate me forever! However, with some of the changes they made this year, such as making it in August instead of June, two weeks instead of six, a jumpstart reader program […]

Check THIS out!

That’s right – i’m ROCKIN the WOAP, bitches! That’s right – i am finally, FINALLY AHEAD! for the first time this year, my word count is RIGHT WHERE IT SHOULD BE! And it’s all because of Big Brother – who says reality tv is bad?!? Deciding that I should count all those words I get […]

Two things:

1. TBF is always telling me that The Pup needs some color, but somehow, I don’t think THIS is what he meant…   Poor lil white Irish baby… and that’s WITH sunscreen. *chuckles* 2. What happens when you give a 15 year old and an almost 13 year old permission to raid the wood pile, […]