…Lousy with Virginity…
So, The Boy dropped Peppermist off for her auditions, where she was to meet her friends. I got a call about five minutes later, to direct her where to go, where the auditions were being held, and talk her through a couple things. Then? A second call, where she tells me her friends bailed on her and didn’t show. Since the boy had my car, I had no ride, so I offered to call Gramma and have her stop by on her way home from work, and got:
“Have her come get you? I don’t want gramma, I want YOU…”
Awwwwwwww. Needless to say, I dropped everything, stole Papa’s car, (with his and Nana’s blessings) and dashed to the school. And checked out her audition form, and patted her arm and gave her a hug, and encouraged her to be assertive and pick a dance group, and applauded when she sang, and did all the good Mama things that good mama’s do on such an occasion – including pointing out that she was FAR from the worst singer there, despite what she says.
Before the audition, the Director talked a bit about the roles available, the songs that would need sung, the fact that they need more boys to try out, and then the kicker: They have whitewashed it according to School Board Policy. Among some of the changes: Rolling up gum in their shirt sleeves instead of cigarettes, drinking cola instead of beer, a few word changes in some of the songs, ‘Dad space’ between dancers, and the requirement that Parents sign off their permission on Sandy’s final outfit – the uber leather get-up.
It’s the word changes that had me protesting – loudly – however. In front of the group. You see, in the Sandra D song, they had to change the word “virginity”.
VIRGINITY.
PEOPLE. VIRGINITY IS NOT A BAD WORD.
In fact, I’d rather my daughter not only KNOW the word but STILL POSSESS IT until she’s oh, 87! These are the same people shoving “abstinence only” education down their throats, and they thinks VIRGINITY is too racy to be in a play.
VIRGINITY!
I… I am SPEECHLESS. It’s ridiculous to the extreme. Instead of Lousy with virginity, the words now read “Lousy Miss Prudidity”, which ISN’T EVEN A WORD according to FireFox.
AUGH. It’s RIDICULOUS.
The only thing making me smile in terms of Sandra D this morning is this little guy – who’s parents CLEARLY are AWESOME.
Tell me about it…. stud!
Oh, the house is atwitter today, with random comments like this:
“I don’t drink, swear, I don’t rat mah hair, I get sick from one ciggarrette! Keep you’re filthy paws of my silky drawers! Would you pull that on Annette?”
“Elvis! Elvis! Let me be! Keep that pelvis far away from me!”
And of course the ever popular randomly sung out loud and proud:
“But… now… there’s… NOOOOOOOOO where to HIIIIIDE since I pushed your love asiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiide I’m OUT of my HEAD… hopelessly devoteeeeeeeeeeed…”
Yes, boys and girls – it’s time to try out for the local production of Grease, and Peppermist and the girls have been eagerly awaiting the day. Until today, of course, when I get a panicked text “It’s TODAY?!” And when I said yes, and told her the time, Peppermist proved she is SO my child… “TO THE YOUTUBES!”
Even now, she’s sitting, curled up with my laptop, earphones in place – with the volume loud enough I can still hear it, naturally – playing “Sandra D” over and over again and singing along.
She may not get the part – but as she said just now talking to C, who won’t join her because she’s ‘not good at acting’:
Peppermist: Neither am I, but I’d hate myself if I didn’t at least try!
That’s MAH BABY. Good luck, Peppermist!
O HAI DECEMBER!
….so remember when I woke up a few week ago and went “ew, snow” and then it was like 15 degrees below zero and brrr cold and no more snow, and stuff? And I was still walking around in just sandals and socks? Yeah, remember that?
This morning we woke up to THIS.
Yeah. And when I went to bed at 2am? None of *gestures wildly* THAT was happening. Which means, when I got up this morning to take Peppermist to Twirl Girl practice, a number of things happened:
1. I promptly fell on my considerable ass. Ouch. Wrenched my back, my knee hurts, and I’m irritated. Fuckin’ snow, man.
2. I almost hit one of the teenagers cars pulling out of the driveway. The trick of driving in that much snow is “go for it and PRAY, and oh, look, some brave soul already laid down tracks for us, FOLLOW THEM!” Fortunately, the end of the El Camino went unscathed.
3. The boy took MY car to school again – the truck is without a starter currently. To say this terrifies me is an understatement. It’s MY CAR.
4. The preheretofore mentioned El Camino? Promptly got stuck. The neighbors helped push him out (I would have been down there, and was on my way – but remember the sandals socks issue? and the fall? I need to unearth my boots – I have one, dunno where the other is. But yeah.) – but it was a comedy of errors as S was driving, and very timid. “GUN IT!” they say, and she goes “Wha?” And then they had to say “Put it in DRIVE sweetie, and take your foot off the brake…”
5. When they finally got the El Camino into the previously driven tracks with the help of The Boy who came back around to see what was taking so long, and gave a good ole HEAVE HO to the back end himself, Z yelled “KEEP GOING!” And ran alongside, opened the passenger side door and dove in. While I laughed and kicked myself for not video taping it all. I’m a bad blogger. I know.
6. The dog is BESIDE HIMSELF WITH JOY. Which also means I had to go untangle his ass cuz he’s a dumbshit and STILL wrapped himself around the tree. Sigh.
7. The electricity keeps flickering – which makes my internets go “OH NOZ! SHUT DOWN!” and me going “OH NOZ! START BACK UP YOU BASTARD!”
8.The buses for the littles is running TWO HOURS LATE. Sure, all you babies down south would just close school for the day, NOT US. We’ve a rep to keep, dammit – so our kids go to school ANYWAY. The neighbor was taking her nieces into the school, so gave the pup a ride too.
9. SOMEONE in this house, who shall remain nameless, (but is totally pictured to the right sporting the SNOWFLAKE pin a lady at nana’s church gave her – and who I’m TOTALLY blaming for all *gestures* this) is THRILLED with the snow fall.
10. That cute little face is getting WHITEWASHED as soon as she gets home. Just sayin.
NaBloPoMo #30! WHOOO!
Well would you look at that! I found something to post every day for 30 days – and with a minimum of fluff posts! AND you all came and saw and played along! Thanks for doing that – you guys are the best!
And – after 30 days of posting, I really have nothing else to say today. Haha!
So congrats to all the others who have succeeded in NaBloPoMo, and special congrats to those who whipped out 50k for NaNoWriMo, which I completely bombed at this year. Heh.
And to all of use who didn’t QUITE perform up to the standards we wanted too this month? Hey – there’s always next time!
Hey, HEY JOSH!
I’ve mentioned him before, so all you fine folks are following Josh Shipp now, right? RIGHT? What do you mean, no….
Alrighty, let me introduce you to him again! Josh Shipp is, as he says, a guy who shouldn’t be here. He grew up in foster care, and until one teacher and one foster family got him, and proved to him that he had something to say – he was headed down the wrong road. He’s also a success story for those of us with kids that get in trouble for talking in class – he did too, and now he’s one of the most sought after Teen Motivational speakers of our time.
He’s amazing – he really is. His tagline is “In your face, but on your side” and his no-nonsense advice is almost 99% of the time exactly what I’d tell a teen that came to me with the same problem. He’s a very big advocate of teens and parents TALKING, and you know that’s my number one statement around here!
He also has a new Josh in a Box Identity program, to help teens as they struggle to find their own sense of self – and from what I’ve seen, it’s really good, and worth every penny.
Now, don’t think Josh is just for the teens – because he opened a special Grown-up section of his site for us parents too.
So here’s what I want you to do: Send your Teenager to HeyJosh.com and let them poke around. It’s a good place for them to ask for advice on things they might not be able to talk to you about yet, and I’ve yet to see Josh stumble in the advice department.
Don’t believe me? Check it out. This is the latest on his weekly advice show:
See? He talks good game, and backs it up with good advice. So get you’re kids over there – send them the link today.
Then? Go to the grownup section, and sign up yourself. LIsten to his message, sign up for the email list, get the PDF “Five Mistakes” and watch that video too. It’s a great primer for the Parent of a Teenage Human, and well worth the watch/read.
You’ll be glad you did – and tell Josh I sent ya. 🙂
