Raising girls – Caution: land mines ahead!
Raising girls is a scary scenario for many folks. Girls are moody and unpredictable and prone to self esteem issues and have to fight for careers and equal pay and face the huge dilemma of family vs. career and have to figure out how to juggle that, all while remaining supportive and happy and strong for their families. That’s a LOT of pressure to put on a girl, you know? Add to that the casual sexualization, the images in the media that focus on perfection (of an air brushed quality, of course!) and we find ourselves juggling what we see in print and on screen and what real girls look and feel like.
It’s a daunting task for a parent!
A while back Dove made a commercial filled with women of all shapes, sizes, and colors, naked (tastefully) and – most importantly – smiling. These women were (and are!) each beautiful, and comfortable in their own skin, despite a little extra curve there, a wrinkle here, a pouch over there. As a lover of women all shapes and sizes, the commercial made me smile every time I viewed it.
Since then, Dove has expanded their Campaign for Real Beauty into a feature rich site and resource to encourage healthy self-esteem for our girls! There is SO MUCH there in the ‘Just for Girls‘ section, including the True You booklet for mom’s and daughters, which goes through the mother/daughter relationship and how communication is the key.
You know what I ALWAYS say around here – TALK TO YOUR KIDS! This is no different, Dove Agrees. Here are some statistics that are important for us to know about our girls:
One-half of women around the world see family relationships as
having the greatest impact on their self-esteem.*
• Two-thirds of women believe that they are expected to be more
physically attractive than their mother’s generation.*
• Dissatisfaction with body image increases as girls progress to
adolescence. While 75% of girls 8-9 years old say they like the
way they look, only 56% of girls 12-13 years old feel that way.**
• One-third of all girls 14-17 years old think they are overweight,
and 60% are trying to lose weight.**
• Over 50% of girls 11-15 years old say that their mother helps
them the most when they have a problem.**** Dove’s Real Truth About Beauty Study
** Girl Scout Research Institute – Teens Before Their Time, 2000
***Girl Scout Research Institute – The Ten Emerging Truths: New Directions for Girls 11-17, 2002
There are a ton of resources there to be had – including quizzes for your girls to take on the health of their relationships with their friends and family, body facts and fiction, how their self-esteem affects other people, how to help their confidence grow, and many more. I encourage you to check it out, and then show it to your girls! Healthy self-esteem starts at home, and Dove has some great tools to help us get there.
It's that time of year!
And no, this time I don’t mean “Holidays”! No, this time it’s all about the Pre-Teen Pup, and her swimming. For the next six months she will be in the pool, thinking about the pool, talking about the pool, dreaming about the pool, and working her hardest to shave time off her her best race each and every time she gets in the pool and competes. It’ll be all backstroke this, and breaststroke that and freestyle splash n dash and omg the butterfly my poor shoulders, block starts, flip turns and streamline, streamline, streamline! It’ll be new suits, team suits, goggles that fall off in the middle of races, adjustments, cheers and even some tears. It’ll be fights with coach and adoration of coach and promises of ice cream for all DQs. (In our family, a DQ – disqualification, gets DQ – Dairy Queen!) It’ll be sauna like temperatures in the pool, videos and pictures, tired swimmers and exhausted mommies.
In short? It’ll be a blast!
(…mostly… ha!)
I’ve been doing this Swimmer Support role since my sister was on the High School swim team. I was down on deck, counting down the endless laps for the 500 freestyle for her, delivering her inhaler, and wearing a shirt that declared me “J’s sister!” next to my mom who wore a shirt that said “J’s mom!” while she ran around in a shirt over her suit that said “I’m J!”
Her heart was broken when my older two showed zero interest in swimming other than for fun. Then came the Pup, who dove in last year with Auntie and all the cousins and hasn’t looked back – much to my sister’s delight. It just wasn’t quite right without my being in the stands, apparently!
Last year The Pup wanted to beat her cousin in just ONE THING – though he had a year’s previous experience and as a male tends to just be stronger and faster. In the end, though, she prevailed. She got an “Honor Time” certificate for her backstroke – which is a 4th place team finish. Her cousin got several good times and medals, but they were in his SECOND year, not his first like the Pups, so that satisfied that goal.
This year, her goals are all about times. She has an AMAZING breaststroke, which is something that just sort of clicked for her toward the end of last season, and her backstroke is still very strong. Freestyle is strong, her butterfly is coming along, and we’re all about beating last years times for personal best. She also has her eyes on the times of the High School Champ of my Sister’s generation – who FINALLY saw one of her records come down just this year! She knows she won’t be able to hit those until High School, but she’s DETERMINED to be ready to destroy the record board by then.
I believe she can do it.
But most importantly – SHE believes she can do it, and I’ll sit in the uncomfortable bleachers, sweating like a pig in the humid 12930182 heat for the next 6 months and all the years following, and cheer myself hoarse for hours on end to help her get there. After all, lookit that face – could YOU resist?
Yeah, no.
Me either.
GO PIRANHAS!
Gift Ideas: Wear your Music!
It’s that time of year again! We suddenly start wondering what the heck we’re going to get the teenagers for Christmas. Their tastes are different, the gifts smaller and way more expensive! So it’s time to plan ahead.
I ran into this site on one of those “follow the links and see where you land” forays into the wide world of the internets – and what do you know – something awesome for the music loving teen in your house!
It’s called Wear Your Music.org – and they sell bracelets made of guitar strings. They have several that are actual strings owned and played on by actual music stars – but if that’s too rich for your blood, check out the Fashion Bracelets instead, which are just $10 a pop, and come in a variety of colors. They also have charms and necklaces for under $20! And the best part? Proceeds go to the Artist chosen charities.
AND – if you become a fan of WYM.org on facebook, you are eligible to win free stuff every week from now to Christmas!
So… what are you waiting for? Check it out!
Start Strong!
Wow – lookit that! After I hit publish on this puppy, I will have posted 15 days in a row, one for each day in November! Of course, it’s not always in the morning, and once there was even a “oh crap! here! have a picture of snow!” – but none the less, we’ve made it halfway through the month! Hurray! How are my other NaBloPoMo-mates doing?
(…don’t ask about NaNoWriMo… Shhh.)
So! Today, I wanted to point you to another site, which my lovely Mama pointed me too. She works for the local Women’s Shelter, which councils women who are in domestic violence situations. As we know, this often starts in the teenage years – with the first relationships, so that’s where we need to start, and Start Strong is an initiative that aims to do just that.
Start Strong: Building Healthy Teen Relationships is the largest initiatve ever to be funded to target the 11-14 year olds. It aims to rally entire communities to promote healthy relationships, and uses the Start Strong Mode to:
– educate and engage youth in and out of school settings,
– educate and engage teen influencers such as parents and caregivers, teachers and other mentors,
– change policy and environmental factors, and
– implement effective communications and social marketing strategies.
Start STrong has started in 11 communities, and hopes to expand. If you’re near Atlanta, Austin, Boston, Bridgeport, Bronx, Idaho, Indianapolis, Los Angeles, Oakland, Providence or Wichita, please check them out, and consider getting your teens involved.
Healthy relationships start at home, and every added bit we can do to educate our teens is well worth it – so check them out!
RAK Giveaway WINNERS!
Winner, winner chicken dinner! We ended up with 10 amazing folks signing up for the giveaway (Thanks Mama, for the late night Ravelry plug!) to win a String-Ring of their very own! So this morning, as soon as I drug myself from my OH SO WARM bed into the chill of a -4F morning, I plugged each name, in order, into Randomizer.org:
And then, after double checking the names – I hit “Randomize” on that puppy to see who won. DRUUUUUUUUUUUM ROLL PLEASE!
Congrats Charlene! I’ll shoot you an email here shortly with the details and get your String-Ring out to you asap!
Thanks to everyone who entered and shared their stories! I loved reading them, and I wish everyone a wonderful holiday season! Remember to be kind to a stranger today – even if it’s just a smile. If they ask why? Tell them Lessa told you too.
🙂 Happy Saturday!
