![\"NovaScotiaGSA-Poster3\"](\"http:\/\/parentingteensblog.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/09\/NovaScotiaGSA-Poster3-300x219.jpg\" "\\"NovaScotiaGSA-Poster3\\"")
I had my first crush when I was five. His name was Jimmy H. and he lived in the house behind us. He was two years older, wiser, and so very handsome – it was destiny that we marry and have many babies that had his dark good looks. We were BFFs and practically inseparable – watching Batman on TV, than acting it out. I of course, was either Batgirl or Catwoman depending, on the episode that day.<\/p>\n
I had my first kiss in first grade. While Jimmy H. was still my BFF, there was another boy who lived down the street from me named Doug. He wore a leather jacket, rode a brand new Huffy bike, and was always getting into trouble. He was a Bad Boy, and I was head over heels in love. We played freeze tag. He choose to unfreeze me by kissing my cheek. I was a goner, and thus began my infatuation with bad boys.<\/p>\n
I had my first ‘boyfriend’ in 4th or 5th grade. Another Jimmy, Jimmy K. I remember walking the halls all through our recesses at the local Christian School, talking about anything and everything. I still have the necklace his mom made for him to give to me for Christmas that year – it still makes me smile. I cried when he moved away.<\/p>\n
My first actual boyfriend came into my life at a sports retreat just before my 15th birthday. His name – unsurprisingly at this point – was Jimmy. Jimmy M. I had my first real kiss that same weekend, and we dated for 2 years. I went on to have other boyfriends, of course, but that’s how it all started.<\/p>\n
But there’s some things missing in there, too. I had my first girl crush when I was 10. Her name was Laura, and I didn’t really think about it, because we’d been total BFFs for some time, and it seemed natural and right to want to grow up and share a house and be together forever. I didn’t delve any deeper to see if it meant more than BFF, because I didn’t care. I just knew we’d be together forever. I cried when she moved away.<\/p>\n
After that, there was a steady stream of female friends, and looking back now, I can pinpoint the exact time I realized that my girl crushes likely meant I was bisexual. It wasn’t anyone I knew personally, but instead it was Suzanne from the Bangles and one key moment of the Walk Like An Egyptian video. There’s a close up of her eyes, and she looks from side to side on beat, and I’ve never forgotten that image ever. I wanted to stare at her, into those eyes, forever. It was 1986, I was 16 years old, and I never told a soul.<\/p>\n
It’s not surprising that I’d choose to keep such a discovery under wraps, considering my background in Christian schools, attending church three times a week, and living in such a conservative town. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever come right out and told my mom that I dig girls, too, (…hi mom! *L*) Though I think she’s figured it out over the years.<\/p>\n