{"id":85,"date":"2004-08-19T23:41:44","date_gmt":"2004-08-20T08:41:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/2004\/08\/19\/in-case-you-were-wondering\/"},"modified":"2004-08-19T23:41:44","modified_gmt":"2004-08-20T08:41:44","slug":"in-case-you-were-wondering","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/2004\/08\/19\/in-case-you-were-wondering\/","title":{"rendered":"In case you were wondering…"},"content":{"rendered":"

…and you know you were. heh.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
Doctor Unheimlich<\/A> has diagnosed me with
Lessa’s Syndrome<\/b><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Cause<\/b>:<\/td>\ncaught in hospitals<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Symptoms<\/b>:<\/td>\nsquawking, hydrophobia, occasional lockjaw, food cravings<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Cure<\/b>:<\/td>\ntake four sprigs of belladonna every day for the rest of your life<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
\n
Enter your name, for your own diagnosis:<\/form>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n

<\/center><\/p>\n

Squawking??? Oddly enough I do hate to get my face wet – hydrophobia? I also suffer occasional lockjaw, and well, LOOK at me, it’s obvious food cravings and I get along very very well.<\/p>\n

Now…. the hell is belladonna???<\/p>\n

Bah. Someone else got a cure of “infect someone else” – that sounds much more fun. Hee.<\/p>\n

~~~<\/p>\n

Man. All these new babies being born around the Blogasphere. Dooce<\/a>, SJ<\/a>, Yvonne<\/a>, Stacey<\/a>, Jen<\/a>….. And I know a fellow RPer that is preggers, plus know of two others – one who just had twins! yeesh!<\/p>\n

And here MY baby is starting Kindergarten. You’d think that’d give me a little twinge – seeing as how I’ll have an empty nest for several hours a day, maybe thinking perhaps it’d be nice to do it all over again..<\/p>\n

And then I reread their stories.
\nAnd look at the pup.<\/p>\n

And realize that i do not have a SINGLE ‘maybe.. what if… i wish’ twinge at ALL. Nope. Not a one. Hell, I can’t wait till the first two go back to school on Tuesday, and the baby starts the following monday. Those hours of an empty nest mean SILENCE from the CONTINIOUS TALKING of a five year old. my GOD that child can TALK. Holy hell. <\/p>\n

Some prime moments lately:<\/p>\n

pup: “I love you 345THOUSANDmiles!”
\nme: I love you more.
\npup: “oh. you mean like 125?”
\nMe: “……..yeah”<\/p>\n

Me: PUP! the arm of the couch is NOT a BALANCE BEAM!
\npup: close enough for a dismount SEE?
\nme: *cover’s eyes, peeks after crash*
\npup: told ya.<\/p>\n

me: what do you want for dinner?
\npup: snake legs and lizard eyes.
\nme: “……… i knew i’d regret saying that. what was it really again?”
\npup: MOOOOOOOOOOOOM!! Chicken gravy and rice!!
\nme: oh.
\npup: you forgotted.
\nme: i’m old.
\npup: nope. GRANDPA’S OLD!<\/p>\n

pup: That turn was easy.
\nme: uh – it was on a balance beam.
\npup: i could do it better. see? *falls on ass, but strikes a pose*
\nme: nice recovery.
\npup: a perfect 10.
\nme: no more gymnastics for you.
\npup: ok. hey- did that handsome guy win swimming?
\nme:…..sure.
\npup: Wonder if he peed in the pool like i did in the lake.
\nme:….. no.
\npup: good.
\nme:”…..”<\/p>\n

pup: i’m going to marry henry’s older brother.
\nme: he know that?
\npup: i told him.
\nme: what he say.
\npup: he said no. I told him i knowed he had a crush on me.
\nme: what he say then?
\npup: he said no. i said yes. he said no. I said yes. He said FINE!
\nme:……oh.
\npup: I winned.
\nme: obviously. think maybe you should remember his name if your going to marry him?
\npup: *palms forhead* I always FORGET… doesn’t matter. I’ll call him the same you do daddy.
\nme: what’s that?
\npup: that WORD I can’t say. Until i’m older. like you.
\nme: you mean ‘asshole’?
\npup: YEAH. you call him that for me until i’m older.
\nme “….”<\/p>\n

pup: We want to watch that boy movie!
\nme: what boy movie?
\npup: that ONE that starts with the world I can’t say!
\nme: aw hell.
\npup: THAT ONE! THAT”S THE WORD!
\nme: That’d be hellboy.
\npup: *rolls eyes* that’s what i SAID.<\/p>\n

~~~~<\/p>\n

And that goes on all. day. every. day. From the time she wakes up till the time she actually stops moving and collapses into sleep. Do I want more kids? not just no, but HELL<\/b> NO!<\/p>\n

however – she does balance this incredible ability to be the most annoyingly obnoxious child with moment’s like these. At the lake, she’s wading in front of me, I grab the camera and say “SMILE!” and get this incredible shot (click to supersize):<\/p>\n

<\/a><\/center><\/p>\n

Going to get that one framed. After I take the dog ass out of the picture. Took me 2 days to figure out what the hell that was. *L* I’ll be removing that before printing and framing. Sometimes it’s good to be a digital diva.<\/p>\n

Who only has ONE! MORE! CLASS! until I’m ALL FUCKING DONE! WHOOT!<\/p>\n

Anyway. More “handsome guys” in swimming to watch now. Yes. I’m a shameless Olympic geek. bite me. heh.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

…and you know you were. heh. Doctor Unheimlich has diagnosed me withLessa’s Syndrome Cause: caught in hospitals Symptoms: squawking, hydrophobia, occasional lockjaw, food cravings Cure: take four sprigs of belladonna every day for the rest of your life Enter your name, for your own diagnosis: Squawking??? Oddly enough I do hate to get my face […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-85","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-myriad"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/85","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=85"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/85\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=85"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=85"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gonfalon.org\/eclat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=85"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}