‘Days of our PreTeen Lives’ Update!

Like sands through the hourglass…

Since Sarah is depending on this for her soap opera, and because there is little more that I love then embarassing my kids! Here we go! Today’s update on THATBOY!

So! I asked her if she told him what I said and what the guidelines are and what he said. Apparently, he said that he figured that would be my take on the situation, and that it was all cool with him, and that he’d “Love to go to Awana’s” with her. Harumph.

Since she didn’t have much time to talk to him today, because it was the first day of Clubs, (and they are in two different ones -the girl is taking the “future Nurses club”) She didnt give him her phone number yet. HOWEVER she DID promise THATBOY the Peanut Butter brownies that I had gotten for her to make for ME! HARUMPH! I told her that instantly (via M’s suggestion) I am instating a “Mommy Tax” whereupon NO ONE GETS THE BROWNIES UNTIL MOMMY GETS ONE! I think it’s perfectly reasonable, don’t you?

Then she was like “How do I get him my phone number? Cuz we can’t put notes in each other’s lockers and stuff. And I didn’t have time today!” And I was like duh. write the note this weekend and include it in the brownies. Then i was like “I mean DONT GIVE IT TO HIM EVER! or GIVE it to him INSTEAD OF MY BROWNIES!” Which she found amusing. And said I was good at this “romantic stuff”

This WHAT? OMFG. I gotta learn to keep my mouth shut!

But! Amusingly, as they were talking in the library (awwwwwwww) he looked over and saw The Boy, and BAILED. “CRAP! there’s your brother! See ya later!” BWAHAHAHAHA! Then, they were talking about the clubs they’d joined? And turns out? he’s in the SAME CLUB as The Boy! Oh - this is gonna get GOOD! I can just FEEL it. MUHAHAHAHAH!

Ahem.

~~~

IN other news. I? Am going to wear this next time I see THATBOY. For I? Am Lessa the Great! FEAR ME! I got my t-shirt from KristyK today! It’s beautimous and I can FEEL THE POWAH it gives with the proclamation of my given (by Kristy) name!

In the last contest, my mum actually won, but she being fabulous gave her prize to me since I’d come SO CLOSE to winning SO MANY TIMES! Thanks Mum! [be sure to visit her in her new digs, btw!] Thanks Kristy! THATBOY is sure to fear me NOW!

~~~

And - in still OTHER news - positive prove that the pup is mine:

Bag of cheetos, cat in lap, headphones on, eyes locked on screen, mouse in hand. Yup, she’s mine alright!

And cute too. Man. Did I luck out or what? She was playing freddie the fish, by the way, which just just figured out how to ‘win’ completely. She’s so proud! *Grin*

THAT. FUCKING. BITCH.

THAT FUCKING BITCH called just now. It’s not even fucking midnight. In fact, it’s 11:30. And if I’m not letting my dog out at 3:30 as usual, I need her to go out NOW. So I let her out. And there’s a cat. And she barks. Or there’s a breeze and she barks, wtf ever. And I get a call.

I love caller ID. I didn’t answer it. I was on my way to the bathroom and well, if I heard her whiny bullshit little fake ass bitchy voice, i’da lost it. Sure enough - hit the message “would you pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase bring in your dog?”

Um, lemme think.

NO YOU FUCKING CUNT! IT ain’t even midnight - at which time i had PLANNED on locking her in the damn house, so as not to listen to the little witch (which means I’ll be awake at the same time as always and listening to the dog pace) and I’ll put her out at 6:00 am. Which of course should be fine, becaus ehtat’s when THEY get up.

I do not work on that schedule. Just like they don’t work on mine. They don’t give a FUCK about waking up the neighborhood at 5am while going off to work, or running belt sanders, or any of the previously mentioned things I don’t bitch about. Like TONIGHT - they had the road BLOCKED with cars - there was like 7 of them! All racing down the street, turning around in my driveway, and I didn’t say a WORD. because I didn’t CARE. I have NEVER COMPLAINED about her shit that she thinks don’t stink.

So you know what? They can wait till fucking midnight to have her inside. As they’ve NEVER complained about it before? OBVIOUSLY it’s not a problem unless they’re still awake anyway. So take THAT.

Worst thing is, since the dog actually was ready to come in before midnight, she’s gonna think she won. But oh. I’ve got NEWS for her. *SMIRK* This is FAR from over.

The perfect neighbor is about to meet the perfect bitch.

Bring it on.