hrrrrrrrm.

Well I got official word from the school today – I am indeed going to graduate a full quarter earlier then we had initially planned! This means come September next year I’m freeeeeee.

This of course, induces mixed outbursts of “yay! I can’t wait!” to “holy CRAP now what do I do?” And minor panic of the stress of the last three quarters that i know are going to be the toughest of all the time combined. Part of me is freaking that now I want to be a professional student, the rest of me knows that’s a load of crap because it does get so damn stressful and I’m to the point that I just need something of a break from the constant learning, and get back into the more creative side of things.

Speaking of creative side of things – the Slam that I did the poster in class for is on November 18th, and I’m seriously contemplating packing up and actually taking off and going to it…. sans kids sans hubby just me alone in the big city.. MUHAHAHAHA… drunken debauchery!

ok – not really. *L* But I am planning on going. Sis is gonna see if she can keep the kids for the day, I’m gonna beg the Moosie to watch the kids overnight, and see if I can scrape enough together to get a cheapy hotel room for the night as I no longer know anyone who lives up there – they’ve all moved south! Moosie has some friends up there but well – those are mom’s buds, yannow? I have no problem taking advantage of my own friends, but taking advantage of moms is another story. *chuckles* So! Cheapy hotel, tons of gas – my entrance is paid for and they even gave me a complementary membership for the year too. Cool huh? We’ll see how it’s going closer to the date.

Specially as that’s midway through Nanowrimo, and I should be good and buried in total panic mode by then about finishing. Either that or finished and gloating. Either those two or have already given up by that point. *L* Told the asshole tonight that I was gonna do it, and got the expected amount of complete disbelief and lack of support and demands of “wtf? why would you do that while your in school? 30 days? it’s going to be CRAP. why would you bother writing something that you know is total shit?” and so on and so forth. Even after I read him the ‘what is’ from the site, he still didn’t get it. Didn’t really expect him too but some sort of ‘hey cool.’ would have been nice. The odd thing about it was in the same moment of asking me why the hell I would do such a thing, the same breath spawned ‘you know you’ll finish it, because your too stubborn not to.’ gotta love the whole conflicting thing.

Course, he’s really gonna freak if/when he reads the subject matter. Homophibic prick that he is.

But back to graduating early – think i’m gonna do my damndest to celebrate at gayday in disneyland next year. I really wanted to attend again this year, but obviously that didn’t happen – but I was looking at my miles statement for ak air and I think by then I should have enough miles to actually get a free ticket and only need the cash for all the other things – parties and room and such. That’s my goal I think.

Course, gonna have to find a way to take the kids and asshole down before that. Because if I don’t they will lynch me. *L* Hopefully if I can keep a tight reign on the finances like i’m planning on, then we can use the tax refund to make a trip down there and take the kids to the parks and then jaunt on back home. Course, it’d have to be a really GOOD refund and I’ll have to get one hella deal on plane tickets, but I dunno. It’s something to hope for anyway. We’ll see how it works out. I’d be happy to save up and bring the kids with me in October, but the asshole wouldn’t go for that at all and with kids that’d serious cut back on the dance parties and such and it’s my celebration dammit. *L*

Just thoughts kinda comingling around at this point. Tangled up with the total panic that as of September the asshole fully expects that I will be working and making money right away in my chosen field with my still wet degree. Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuure. This is why i’ve always planned on working for myself, because there simply is no available firms to work for here in my town, very few in anchorage -because they all tend to be mom and pop places, and the only big time job working for someone else that I could get would involve moving from the state. Since he refuses to do that – well. I’m pretty much stuck here making it on my own. So come September (and before then as well, just like I have been doing) it’s all about getting my name out there in town and out of town and over the web and getting some money coming in. Planning on trying elance, and a couple other design plances online that are made for the freelance graphic artist (wow – can I catually call myself that now? hrm.) and we’ll go from there. It’s not gonna come like the day after I graduate like he seems to think it is. Hell he’s got it in his head that as soon as I’m graduated that I’ll start making money, then as much money as he does, then he can quite and go to school!

like getting a degree is some miracle cure for being poor. god. what an idiot. I swear, he has NO idea. Not saying that i’m not gonna try my hardest to do exactly what he thinks should happen, i’m just far more down to earth on the expectation scale.

I dunno.

anyway – this enough disjointed circular rambling I think for tonight. *chuckles* hoping to get to bed early, head is pounding, jaw hurts from grinding my teeth off and on all day though I keep trying to catch myself, shoulders are stiff, and mind is just. tired.

So.
Heh.
I’ll still be sitting here for hte next 3 hours. who’m’i kidding.

Gotta finish updating Lessa’s Design anyway…. got the css and backgrounds all working right, even got the kick ass little carasel thingy on the portfolio page… just need to update those, and other little nitpicky things here and there. Sleep is for the weak, after all. *grin*