Celebrity Circus! Premiere

Is it just me or is Joey Fatone the perfect Ringmaster for this event? Campy and overly dramatic and looks pretty dapper in the traditional over the top suit, right? Right. Anyway, I admit I had to watch the show this morning online because there are two many shows and not enough DVR space to go around at my house. So the celebs have been training for 8 weeks to learn five tricks (usually one stunt takes a year or more to learn), and are now gonna show us their stuff – there’s already been broken ribs, a broken arm, and other injuries but they’re still here and trying.

And Antonio Sabato Jr is shirtless and wearing eyeliner and I fall in love a little with him all over again. Awwwwww.

And he’s first up. His stunt is the the Flying Silks, where they there is no safety net, and they hold themselves up by wrapping themselves into the silk and he says its the hardest thing he’s ever done – and by the look of his face, I don’t think he’s lying at all. heh. And did I mention he’s shirtless? And wearing dramatic eyeliner? He even shares the sheets – er, silks – with a sexy scantily clad acrobat on occasion, and then a dual of sorts with another male acrobat, scoring him the woman once again… hawt! Judge Aurelia Cats agrees, as do Judges Mitch Gaylord and Louis someone who’s a choreographer, who all but licked his chest with his words. his score average is 7.7. Judges scores count for 50% and then America votes for their favorite for the other 50%.

Supermodel Rachel Hunter is next and there’s a lot of squealing and screaming involved as she learns Cerceau – spinning on a hoop up in the air. She also gets motion sick and throws up a lot. Heh. She has three herniated disks and while ouch – she wails a lot and wonders what the hell she got herself into. Joey helps by mentioning in her intro there’s nothing to break her fall but the concrete. Heh. She does alright though, doing a lot of spinning, not so much with the stunts, but she did alright, better then I could, of course. She’s dizzy but says it’s been fantastic. Judges are pleased with her pointing her toes, though pointed out she should spin faster and do more tricks.Then Louis starts to talk and his lisping drives me to distraction so much so that I almost missed her average score: 6.7.

Wee Man takes on The Wheel of Death – a stunt that’s been banned from the circus for 20 years. He says he hasn’t always wanted to run off and join the circus – the circus has been waiting for him to join. Ha! Lots of falling, not much with fears, he makes fun of everyone and loves every minute of it. Since he’s fearless, he gets the hardest one first up. He certainly isn’t short (hahahah) on confidence! He does really well, even walks on the outside of the wheel. He uses a safety line, but who can blame him, don’t see ME up there! The little girl in the audience with her jaw dropped was entirely too cute. The judges weren’t as impressed as the rest of us though – or at least Louis wasn’t, who’s five gave Wee Man a 6.7.

Clueless Stacey Dash is up next and she’s terrified of heights, but she wants to take control of her fear. She’s doing the Trapeze Bungie.Then she broke a rib. The doctors tell her to take weeks off, and she refuses, so she does the stunt anyway! Her performance isn’t as smooth as it could have been, but she does alright, all told, especially with the 18 gazillion full layout spins at the end. The judges are impressed as well – Louis goes all fabulously gay and says she got a man of his persuasion looking in places he shouldn’t be and you GO girl, and give her an average score of 8.

Blu Cantrell is up and she says if sh hadn’t become a singer she would have joined the circus, but it’s hard and we again see a lot of crying and umum! no! umum! But she’s doing the Spanish Web – and we see a lot of her laying down, and not working, and throwing up. The pros aren’t exactly impressed. Her performance isn’t bad, and she does have lovely lines though the transitions are a little clumsy. The judges aren’t impressed because she didn’t climb up the rope, and Aurelia shows her how to do a split by lifting her leg up over her head – heh. They really are blasting her for not having an exciting performance. Their opinions show in the scores – a 4 from Aurelia and Louis both, and her average is 4.7. Blu says ‘it’s bull crap, I did a damn good job I had 8 weeks and if I trained as much as you did, I’d beat you! Well then. There’s the Diva.

Joey says it’s easy, so they grab him and string him up on the rope while the crowd chants and they string him upside down and take him for a spin as he says he was kidding, it’s not easy, ok, get me down! and his little girl laughs on the sidelines.

Christopher Knight is up next and he laughs that joining the circus at his age, 50, is really not advisable, proven when he broke his arm. So he’s doing a hire wire act. He walks halfway across, and the girl comes floating down on wires to blindfold him as Adrienne Curry – his wife – watches from the audience scared silent. It’s a good look for her. Hah. The next trip across, he has the pretty little girl standing on his shoulders as he walks across once more – he makes it across steady as you please, and I don’t know about anyone else, but it impressed me! The judges said he needed some showmanship, but he fired back that a smile would have unbalanced him. ha! They did say that he did very well, and their scores showed he impressed them as Louis flirts and says his walk was cute. Ha! Average score 6.7.

Last but not least, Olympic Gold Medalist Swimmer, Janet Evans does the Duo Trapeze. Janet says she’s a complete clutz, and she’s scared she’ll hurt herself and says she has trouble with the whole sexy thing. She does pretty well though, and while at times it was a bit awkward, the performance was nice and she has abs of STEEL. The judges reward her attempts with an average score of 7.3.

Who will be eliminated? Tune in next week to find out!

Tags: Celebrity Circus