…on bein undertall…
Peppermist: You’re short! Me: No, YOU’RE SHORT. Peppermist: Nuh Uh! I’m not short! Gravity just PREFERS me, so KEEPS ME CLOSE. Me: …….
…on school trips and internet friends
Me: HEY! Internet Friend! The HS band is on its way to Miami on Wednesday! Internet Friend: Sweet! Me: yeah, so, all of the punishments for rule-breaking involve “sent home at parent’s expense” and since, ya know, i don’t HAVE any spare expense? I just told Peppermist if she fucks up, she was staying in […]
on the timing of the wedgie…
Glee Cast, on winning their Golden Globe: This is for everyone who ever got a wedgie in high school! Peppermist: I have never gotten a wedgie. Me: In high school – I’m nice and only do that to you at home. Peppermist: It has never happened! Me: oh you LIE! It’s happened JUST THIS YEAR! […]
on optimism and… frugality?
Bug: I gotta… One! One Dollar! One Dollar foot loooooooooong… Pup: Wait, isn’t that supposed to be five dollar? Bug: Yeah. But I’m cheap. And no. We weren’t talking about Subway.
on sex ed with Tweens…
Bug: I love cupcakes more than ANYTHING. Pup: You gonna MARRY a cupcake? Me: An’ have lil cupcake babies! Pup: gonna marry a GIANT cupcake, so the babies be normal cupcake size! Bug: Yup! Though it might make them taste funny… Me: …. wait, what might make it… Oh. My. Gawd! …Yes, he clarified. And […]
